:: Out of Spite, Out of Mind ::

:: Saturday, June 29, 2002 ::

I love making crank calls. LOVE IT! I was bored yesterday so I decided to return a few calls as pranks. victim 1) Craig Turner, an old band mate who wanted me to go see King's X (metal band) in Palo Alto a few nights ago. The character: Jon Doe, construction worker w/heavy Boston accent. "TURNER! This is Jon Doe! You NAW-ked my tooth out at the Caaan-cit (concert) in the Maw-sh pit! Bro, I can't sing Kary-Oh-Kie now! How am I s'pposed to sing Elton John!? Well, anyways let's paint the town soon, we're good like that" Victim 2) Jin- he's really into Ju-jistu and I thought I'd feign to be a sparring partner who is smitten w/him. character: Dominic, sparring partner. "Hello! This is....Dominic! From Jujitsu! I was wondering, like, yesterday? When you held me down....you held me well...and well, I was wondering if we could get together and make kimchiballs...uh, eat them offa each other? Ok, dear- bye!" (Jin's can be homophobic at times, so he needs wake-up calls like this sometimes)

:: Ol Man Factory 6/29/2002 09:51:00 AM [+] ::
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Ah, summer camp...that's right I am hangin' w/the kids again... it's pretty strange cuz some of these kids really look up to me...but had I been a kid w/them they'd probably kick my ass. A little tyke held a door open for me today and said "ladies first!" I was like, ok go ahead then... he was insistent...so of course i came back w/the cliche "youth before beauty" and he was kind of confused...I took the insult and walked through as unladylike as I could...this little kid giggling in my wake. I felt really grown up for not fighting w/him though. I probably would've gotten in a fight w/him if i was 20 years younger. Little bastard! You want a piece of me? See you in like 20 years, you're going down for that one...put that capri sun down and fight me like a man!

:: Ol Man Factory 6/27/2002 02:38:00 PM [+] ::
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What a day! Breakfast: Beer, Pizza @ Park Chow. Wandered around Le Video, was tempted to rent episodes of DeGrassi Jr. High- I didn't. Took a wheat grass shot. Came home, felt like an idiot savant- drifted off on the couch to the sounds of Gauntlet Legends (Aaron and Rad killing the Sewer Worm over and over cuz they needed "gold")...dreamless sleep, I felt like a vegetable...soggy tempura vegetable. It started to all come back to me: Oh yeah, last night I took many shots of 151...that explains this listless feeling and the ineptitude. Next time I try to slaughter an Elvis Costello song like "Indoor Fireworks" (or any good song for that matter), please kill me. Did someone play the jaw harp? Was there a transvestite passed out in my room? Was an angel singing "crash"?
Bill Frisell, round two: completely different show...was "right up in his nuts" as Huw said. (front row) Where I could see all his pedal switching and fancy knob twisting and oh yeah, I guess his nuts as well, butt I was not looking. Must sleep again- they miss me in dreamland....

:: Ol Man Factory 6/24/2002 01:30:00 AM [+] ::
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